Ok, so I'm a little late to get back into blogging. I have reasons (and excuses) which you're probably not too interested in anyway. Too bad. Stop reading here if you not interested. Its been a tough week for me. Who knew I needed to get away that badly??
I completely and thoroughly enjoyed my girl weekend away. It felt was amazing to leave all my problems and issues behind and just let loose for a few days. The unfortunate downside to that is that when I got back, I was a) exhausted and b) dismayed to find all my baggage waiting at home for me to shoulder it once more.
Picking up all that weight again threw me into a bit of a tailspin. I went from being kindof manically happy to being completely down and depressed. I started seeing a therapist as well, which, while helping, is also making me dredge through the pain and trauma I went through.
Add to this some drama with my family (where I was told Im being selfish and I need to just get over it) and and item that was to me a symbol of my hope, being ripped away from me by these same people, and you begin to see why I've been AWOL. Its been a lot to deal with and I'm still not quite at the point where I can say its over.
What I do know is that I will not take the item back. Even if they try to give it back to me, I dont want or need it. I will not allow myself to be treated like crap any longer. I am tired of being the good girl, and letting others stomp all over my heart. In the course of this thing happening, others have said to me that they wouldn't have intentionally hurt me.. but if you know that something your are doing is upsetting/hurting someone and you insist on doing it anyway, then that is intentional hurt. it disregards the other persons feelings in favour of your wants. And I will not allow people to do that to me any longer.
So look out world. Its no more Ms Good Girl.
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